Ahh yes. It is a time of Multi-tasks as end of year marking commitments stand side by side with business development, event management (preparing for a business launch) and moving house. In between there are other 'normal' life activities such as home time, children time and social connection time.
A few days ago I was still in a time panic, wondering about time while in disbelief of the amount of tasks that required completion in that time. My thoughts focused on time poverty - "I don't have enough time" and sure enough, given a little more nourishment and focus, this fear was really going to show itself in a dramatic way.
And then... I realised that there was in fact plenty of time. There was as much time as I allowed, as long as I stopped calculating. Rather like weighing yourself every day and becoming preoccupied about every fluctuation, watching time can end up a similar obsession. Upon stopping the watch, I found there was plenty of time to breathe. And surprise, surprise - there has been plenty of time to address every task as it arises.
Multi-tasking without multitasking.
Addressing and completing single jobs quite completely without blurred vision from the frantic glances at the clock.
I have even found time to relax and appreciate how fortunate I am to have good health, beautiful company and amazing smiles around me, in an amongst the tasks that call for completion.
The calls are regular volume and reasonable weight. Simply because I stopped worrying about the limiting factor.
I wonder how often this approach would benefit me, us, people when getting focused on the limitations rather than the abundance.
So for now - I'm enjoying my new name "Time bender"
Wednesday 7 November 2012
Saturday 20 October 2012
Beyond Stress
"Stress" is referred to in so many contexts, and with so many variations that I'll first take a moment to clarify what I mean by stress, at the time of writing this blog!
STRESS is a mixture of internal events that occur and are experienced negatively as a result of external happenings. These external happenings may be either real or percieved. The main differentiator in stress from any other emotion or body experience is that it can be very hard to pinpoint exactly what is being felt. The mind, body, heart and spirit can seem to be in pain all at the same time with no clear exit lane. This element of confusion seems to be the only consistent factor when it comes to people and stress.
Most other emotions have a beginning, a middle and an exit.
Fear for instance, starts with something being scary and this fear, whether sudden or lingering the sense of being scared challenges a person to respond in such a way as to reduce the fear. And it isn't just the negative emotions - Excitement, starts with information or a sense of possibility mixed with the positive and creates a tingle and an energy, often enough to 'wake' people up and help maintain action and energy when they normally wouldn't have enough.
Stress is almost like an uncontrolled mixture of emotions which are shrouded by impossibility, pressure and fear, panic or dread. Any single action may change the shape or how the stress feels however not shift or alleviate its power at all.
For me personally, I have found ways Beyond Stress simply because I have found the cost to be too great and I have noticed over the last few years that there doesn't even seem to be a benefit. Many years ago, as a child when stress was a staple of my life diet, it was only the feeling of relief and clarity which gave me the impression that there was a benefit. Relief and clarity happened however because of the actions and decisions I made to move forward! I was excited to learn and realise that relief will happen as a result of any release of tension, and clarity is simply when the fog clears - and this could happen regularly and with varying degrees of energy.
So I've taken to thinking - what do I do to reduce if not eliminate my life stresses. Some of these solutions seem so easy when noted down and yet they have taken so much practice and repetition and consistency to actually walk, talk and live.
* I live in truth. This means that any form of deception within my life has either been eliminated, exposed or is noted when it is identified. This does not mean that I walk around telling everyone my life story or my opinions or making my truth someone elses. It just means that congruence and integrity remain my guard rails.
* When the compression of stress begins - I take a breath and start identifying the parts of the problem as soon as I can. Doing this keeps the emotions, experiences and issues separate and prevents compressed layers which like squashed play-doh becomes harder and harder to pull apart without contamination. Identifying does not mean actually doing anything with each part. A bit like noticing the problems that need to be fixed on a car, you can make notes and then make decisions about which ones you can fix, work on or hand over to others.
* "My stress is not your stress" and if I would like to have friends or family who don't mind hearing my stressed space, then it is even more important that I present my information responsibly. Letting someone know how I am feeling is very different to letting them know that they are annoying me or focusing on something in their life that I suddenly think needs fixing!
I wonder, if we knew how much energy and effort stress cost us, whether we would choose to buy in to stress as often and as long as we do currently. Is it worth it?
If it is (for you) - is the benefit something you could achieve without stress? What would you lose being stress-free?
Personally, I don't think it is of sufficient value to nurture and engage in too often. Besides the frantic mix and demand of emotions and physical behaviours which are needed to respond quickly, I don't believe that there is a benefit to bathe in stress. An occasional shower is fine as long as the temperature doesn't scald permanently!
STRESS is a mixture of internal events that occur and are experienced negatively as a result of external happenings. These external happenings may be either real or percieved. The main differentiator in stress from any other emotion or body experience is that it can be very hard to pinpoint exactly what is being felt. The mind, body, heart and spirit can seem to be in pain all at the same time with no clear exit lane. This element of confusion seems to be the only consistent factor when it comes to people and stress.
Most other emotions have a beginning, a middle and an exit.
Fear for instance, starts with something being scary and this fear, whether sudden or lingering the sense of being scared challenges a person to respond in such a way as to reduce the fear. And it isn't just the negative emotions - Excitement, starts with information or a sense of possibility mixed with the positive and creates a tingle and an energy, often enough to 'wake' people up and help maintain action and energy when they normally wouldn't have enough.
Stress is almost like an uncontrolled mixture of emotions which are shrouded by impossibility, pressure and fear, panic or dread. Any single action may change the shape or how the stress feels however not shift or alleviate its power at all.
For me personally, I have found ways Beyond Stress simply because I have found the cost to be too great and I have noticed over the last few years that there doesn't even seem to be a benefit. Many years ago, as a child when stress was a staple of my life diet, it was only the feeling of relief and clarity which gave me the impression that there was a benefit. Relief and clarity happened however because of the actions and decisions I made to move forward! I was excited to learn and realise that relief will happen as a result of any release of tension, and clarity is simply when the fog clears - and this could happen regularly and with varying degrees of energy.
So I've taken to thinking - what do I do to reduce if not eliminate my life stresses. Some of these solutions seem so easy when noted down and yet they have taken so much practice and repetition and consistency to actually walk, talk and live.
* I live in truth. This means that any form of deception within my life has either been eliminated, exposed or is noted when it is identified. This does not mean that I walk around telling everyone my life story or my opinions or making my truth someone elses. It just means that congruence and integrity remain my guard rails.
* When the compression of stress begins - I take a breath and start identifying the parts of the problem as soon as I can. Doing this keeps the emotions, experiences and issues separate and prevents compressed layers which like squashed play-doh becomes harder and harder to pull apart without contamination. Identifying does not mean actually doing anything with each part. A bit like noticing the problems that need to be fixed on a car, you can make notes and then make decisions about which ones you can fix, work on or hand over to others.
* "My stress is not your stress" and if I would like to have friends or family who don't mind hearing my stressed space, then it is even more important that I present my information responsibly. Letting someone know how I am feeling is very different to letting them know that they are annoying me or focusing on something in their life that I suddenly think needs fixing!
I wonder, if we knew how much energy and effort stress cost us, whether we would choose to buy in to stress as often and as long as we do currently. Is it worth it?
If it is (for you) - is the benefit something you could achieve without stress? What would you lose being stress-free?
Personally, I don't think it is of sufficient value to nurture and engage in too often. Besides the frantic mix and demand of emotions and physical behaviours which are needed to respond quickly, I don't believe that there is a benefit to bathe in stress. An occasional shower is fine as long as the temperature doesn't scald permanently!
Saturday 13 October 2012
A mixed message!
Some words just danced their way together, and have ended up saying nothing at all.
Fortunately, after listening to some popular music today I can see that this is quite contemporary of me.
"Do you know where you're going to?" is a theme song from an old movie I've never seen - 'Mahogany'. A pretty song with wistful sentiment.
Is it wistful that I feel when this question arises? I wonder.
It is not sad nor regretful and yet I do not really wonder nor wait for an answer either. So what is the purpose of a question which you do not want an answer for?
I wonder where I'm going to on days when things are wonder-filled and memorable, both positive and negative and neutral, just little splashes and waves lapping against me.
Personified, they would all have different voices - "look at me" one would call for attention, another would be pouty and turn back, glancing back just long enough to see it had been noticed. Like little children, wanting their turn to direct the day.
Today I realise that there are some fears, that once faced, need to be turned away from.
"Face your fears" is something I completely support as I believe that "You create that which you fear" so facing what stirs you can help shift the focus. Cast colour on something that has been a shadow. Sometimes the simple act of casting light can, in one short moment, dissolve something instantly. Other times, it becomes clear that the shape that looked so menacing for so long, is in actuality harmless or quite manageable. It doesn't cease to amaze me how often looking at a fear more closely triggers a smile and humour. Admittedly, with some fears, especially those linked to security or self-worth, looking and seeing doesn't help one feel better nor dissolve the issue. It can leave one feeling perplexed and now stressed for the matter seems serious, the hurdle larger than you imagined and worse, you see that the shadow it casts is much bigger than you first thought.
I've always wondered how to deal with these fears. In the past, I thought it responsible to continue standing there and try again and again to dismantle or manage it.
Today I have taken on the approach which I used to work with so many years ago in workshops and in management groups.
IDENTIFY - Be honest with yourself and recognise the issue, irritation, concern ... anything really.
FOCUS - Look at it closely, clearly and with fresh eyes. Identify the parts that make it up then
ACT - Action can include so many elements. Obviously you can act, however asking someone for help is also an action, researching and looking to others experiences is also action and so it goes on.
SUCCEED - celebrate what is achieved and keep moving.
So with this in mind - with those horrible fears that seem to recur or even evolve and remain with you like a bleach resistant bacteria - TURN AWAY and face the direction you intend to travel.
I'm surprised at how much energy and commitment this turn around calls on.
The wonderful thing is I know that I can do it :)
I don't know where I am going to, however I know the direction I am facing and it is bright, colourful and incredibly dynamic. Every moment a moment of living, pleasure and work all mixed into one.
Years ago I would have been perplexed for the fact I had no answer. Today, there is just joy knowing, feeling that there is so much already around me and that there is nothing more to know beyond what comes to me.
I may even, one day, work out what this blog is actually for. Until then, I'll enjoy it for the electronic share practice space it is.
E-Volution. What fun!
Fortunately, after listening to some popular music today I can see that this is quite contemporary of me.
"Do you know where you're going to?" is a theme song from an old movie I've never seen - 'Mahogany'. A pretty song with wistful sentiment.
Is it wistful that I feel when this question arises? I wonder.
It is not sad nor regretful and yet I do not really wonder nor wait for an answer either. So what is the purpose of a question which you do not want an answer for?
I wonder where I'm going to on days when things are wonder-filled and memorable, both positive and negative and neutral, just little splashes and waves lapping against me.
Personified, they would all have different voices - "look at me" one would call for attention, another would be pouty and turn back, glancing back just long enough to see it had been noticed. Like little children, wanting their turn to direct the day.
Today I realise that there are some fears, that once faced, need to be turned away from.
"Face your fears" is something I completely support as I believe that "You create that which you fear" so facing what stirs you can help shift the focus. Cast colour on something that has been a shadow. Sometimes the simple act of casting light can, in one short moment, dissolve something instantly. Other times, it becomes clear that the shape that looked so menacing for so long, is in actuality harmless or quite manageable. It doesn't cease to amaze me how often looking at a fear more closely triggers a smile and humour. Admittedly, with some fears, especially those linked to security or self-worth, looking and seeing doesn't help one feel better nor dissolve the issue. It can leave one feeling perplexed and now stressed for the matter seems serious, the hurdle larger than you imagined and worse, you see that the shadow it casts is much bigger than you first thought.
I've always wondered how to deal with these fears. In the past, I thought it responsible to continue standing there and try again and again to dismantle or manage it.
Today I have taken on the approach which I used to work with so many years ago in workshops and in management groups.
IDENTIFY - Be honest with yourself and recognise the issue, irritation, concern ... anything really.
FOCUS - Look at it closely, clearly and with fresh eyes. Identify the parts that make it up then
ACT - Action can include so many elements. Obviously you can act, however asking someone for help is also an action, researching and looking to others experiences is also action and so it goes on.
SUCCEED - celebrate what is achieved and keep moving.
So with this in mind - with those horrible fears that seem to recur or even evolve and remain with you like a bleach resistant bacteria - TURN AWAY and face the direction you intend to travel.
I'm surprised at how much energy and commitment this turn around calls on.
The wonderful thing is I know that I can do it :)
I don't know where I am going to, however I know the direction I am facing and it is bright, colourful and incredibly dynamic. Every moment a moment of living, pleasure and work all mixed into one.
Years ago I would have been perplexed for the fact I had no answer. Today, there is just joy knowing, feeling that there is so much already around me and that there is nothing more to know beyond what comes to me.
I may even, one day, work out what this blog is actually for. Until then, I'll enjoy it for the electronic share practice space it is.
E-Volution. What fun!
Monday 8 October 2012
Baby Blog Steps and more e-teething!
Well, here I am typing my first blog entry. I wonder how many people have started with a similar line.
Today this may only end up a short post but like many first steps, it may not be perfect but a start is still a start and as long as I keep going I can only get better.
The so-called little communication pathways I am starting do not feel little right now. In fact, they feel like very large and overwhelming projects. I cannot yet imagine an end point however I am proud to be started, and I trust that one step will simply follow the other and get me somewhere soon. So what are these paths?
www.misia.com.au
A business focused website relating to Life Coaching, Moving through Life Change with Ease and Self Discover Support Services.
"Life Change" Parties and Events - finding the fun in our life changes like Birthdays, Hens/Bucks or Combined and other life stage celebrations.
www.lifenlimb.com.au
Energy and Healing related services including Intuitive Counsel, Life Direction work and readings & Relationship/Sexuality Support. My beautiful husband, Lionel has support services in this space providing support services including Relaxation Massage, Reiki, Mediumship and add-on Healing and Energy work which will add value to the services I provide as he is not in a position to charge for his work at this stage.
www.misiasmiles.blogspot.com
My blog or chatspace where I anticipate that I will share thoughts and ponderings as I step through challenges, journeys, discoveries and excitements in my life path. I can get very excited about realisations and their impact in my life, often stretching the discovery across many life layers and sharing with friends. These stories are often used to help illustrate points or more clearly describe a different perspective. Perhaps here, they will remain alive longer and help me remember or refer over time.
www.facebook.com/successfulsolutions
I am also wanting to establish a reliable and fun photos and events pathway and facebook, with its timeline view will be perfect.
Now, to ensure every space gets a little consistent attention. Progress and learning is guaranteed to follow.
"Discovery - the adventure which combines a little of everything - joy, curiosity, caution, fun, anticipation, dread, fear, enthusiasm and so it goes on. True living makes for a true life"
Today this may only end up a short post but like many first steps, it may not be perfect but a start is still a start and as long as I keep going I can only get better.
The so-called little communication pathways I am starting do not feel little right now. In fact, they feel like very large and overwhelming projects. I cannot yet imagine an end point however I am proud to be started, and I trust that one step will simply follow the other and get me somewhere soon. So what are these paths?
www.misia.com.au
A business focused website relating to Life Coaching, Moving through Life Change with Ease and Self Discover Support Services.
"Life Change" Parties and Events - finding the fun in our life changes like Birthdays, Hens/Bucks or Combined and other life stage celebrations.
www.lifenlimb.com.au
Energy and Healing related services including Intuitive Counsel, Life Direction work and readings & Relationship/Sexuality Support. My beautiful husband, Lionel has support services in this space providing support services including Relaxation Massage, Reiki, Mediumship and add-on Healing and Energy work which will add value to the services I provide as he is not in a position to charge for his work at this stage.
www.misiasmiles.blogspot.com
My blog or chatspace where I anticipate that I will share thoughts and ponderings as I step through challenges, journeys, discoveries and excitements in my life path. I can get very excited about realisations and their impact in my life, often stretching the discovery across many life layers and sharing with friends. These stories are often used to help illustrate points or more clearly describe a different perspective. Perhaps here, they will remain alive longer and help me remember or refer over time.
www.facebook.com/successfulsolutions
I am also wanting to establish a reliable and fun photos and events pathway and facebook, with its timeline view will be perfect.
Now, to ensure every space gets a little consistent attention. Progress and learning is guaranteed to follow.
"Discovery - the adventure which combines a little of everything - joy, curiosity, caution, fun, anticipation, dread, fear, enthusiasm and so it goes on. True living makes for a true life"
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