I don't want to be happy!

I am sometimes asked 'Why are you so happy?' and my first honest answer is that in this moment, "I am not happy, however I am (usually and often) content."

Contentment happens and allows alot of room for other emotions to be.
This doesn't mean I have perfect days, with no frustrations or that things go my way at all times.
It also doesn't mean I don't have complaints or little life happenings which I would not have loved to have been different.  But in all honesty, I don't want to be happy all the time.

Just as I don't want to be sad all the time.
I don't want to be delighted all the time.
I don't want to be any one experience all the time.

I think our emotional spectrum is amazing.  I feel fortunate to experience so many parts of that spectrum.  I love that I have the capacity to experience many emotions over the course of a day.

Certainly, lingering sadness, resentment, regret or fear are not emotional states I wish to stay in, however I am glad for the experience because there is usually some information about my environment or about myself to be gained from the emotional moment.

I work to an emotional foundation that is not complex.
I believe we come into this world with an basic ability to feel alert, discomfort and contentment.

Unlike many emotions and feeling models and theories, I do not believe that happiness and fear are at our core.  I believe both are learnt and where being happy develops from contentment, fear develops from being alert.  Depending on your environment and what you have to learn from, feeling happy or scared or irritated will all develop with different strength and with varying priority.

I also do not believe being happy is essential for survival or life.  I believe it is an emotion that is born from contentment and it can definitely help shift a perspective and help you survive, but a life without happiness will not automatically mean you have a bad life.

What is it about this generation and this society that has come to believe that a certain level of happiness is essential to living a good life?

I may not feel happy over the course of a day, a week or perhaps even a month.  However, dependant on what else is part of my emotional diet - it is not necessarily a bad time.  I do not search for feeling happy, neither do I feel that not having a happy experience is a problem.  A bit like ice-cream, I like it and I would probably gladly eat icecream daily, however if i don't have icecream for a month, I will be ok.

Believe it or not - if my days and weeks are filled with a variety of emotions from the simple ones to the more complex, then I am alive and I am living.  As I am also receptive to my environment and interact with people who have the ability to input into my life, I may experience sadness, confusion, curiosity, fear, despair, satiation, excitement, fulfilment, dread, enthusiasm, anger and so the list continues.  I would begin to be concerned if a single emotion became dominant - and yes, that would include happiness.  Because isn't there something manic and even physiologically dangerous about sustaining a single state for a long period of time.

This is part of the distress surrounding stress.  In itself, stress is a natural and needed state.  However, as people live with an expectation or hope that stress will diminish, while not necessarily making any personal change for that to occur - the permanence of the state creates mental and physical health problems.  The occurrence is natural.  Cyclical resolution is ideal.  Permanence is not.

So too, being happy.
No, thank you.

I'm content.  That will do nicely.